Where's the AND?

Most of my clients know that a common question I ask is "where's the AND in this situation?". 
What on earth does that mean? I'll try to explain here:

Dialectical thinking is a more open-minded way of conceptualizing our interactions and experiences. Basically, dialectical thinking means that we can see both sides of something and can appreciate that two ideas can be true at the same time, even if those ideas seem to be opposite or contradictory.

Some examples may be:
-- I value my independence AND I need help sometimes, too. 
-- My viewpoint makes sense AND the other person's viewpoint also makes sense.

Dialectical thinking asks us to abandon black and white/ all or none thinking and instead to adopt a more open "both-and" stance. This can help us in achieving more flexibility in our thinking and can also lead to much more effective communication and satisfaction in our relationships with others because we let go of blaming and learn to validate other points of view in addition to our own.

Is there a situation in your life that could benefit from you letting go of right and wrong and instead asking yourself "where's the AND?"